Ma and Pa were two old hillbillies living on a farm up in the hills.
One day, Pa discovered that the hole under the outhouse was full.
Unsure of what to do, he went inside and told Ma about his dilemma.
“Why don’t you go ask the young’n down the road?” Ma suggested.
“He must be smart; he’s a college gradjyate.”
So, Pa drove down to the neighbor’s house and asked, “Mr. College Gradjyate, my outhouse hole is full, and I don’t know how to empty it.”
The young man replied, “Get yourself two sticks of dynamite—one with a short fuse and one with a long fuse. Place them both under the outhouse and light them at the same time. The first one will shoot the outhouse into the air, and while it’s up, the second one will explode and spread the poop all over your farm, fertilizing the ground. The outhouse should come back down right on top of the now-empty hole.”
Thanking the neighbor, Pa drove to the hardware store and picked up two sticks of dynamite: one with a short fuse and one with a long fuse. He went home, set them up under the outhouse, lit them, and ran behind a tree for safety.
Suddenly, Ma came rushing out of the house and dashed into the outhouse just as the first stick of dynamite went off, launching it into the air. BOOM!
The second stick detonated, spreading poop all over the farm.
Then, WHAM! The outhouse came crashing back down right atop the hole.
Pa sprinted to the outhouse, flung open the door, and called out, “Ma, are you all right?”
As she pulled up her panties, she replied, “Yeah, but I’m sure glad I didn’t fart in the kitchen!”