A modest man was in the hospital for a series of medical tests, one of which wreaked havoc on his digestive system. Despite several prior false alarms, he felt another urgent need to go to the bathroom. Assuming it was just another false call, he decided to stay in bed.
This time, however, he was wrong. Mortified, he suddenly soiled the bed in a way that sent him into a panic. Overwhelmed and desperate to erase any evidence of the incident, he leapt out of bed, bundled up the soiled sheets, and tossed them out of the nearest hospital window in a frantic act of self-preservation.
Outside, an old drunk happened to be staggering along the sidewalk when, out of nowhere, the bundle of sheets landed squarely on him.
Startled and bewildered, the man began flailing his arms and shouting, struggling to disentangle himself from the mysterious, smelly “attacker.” His panicked yells echoed through the street as he finally managed to wrestle free, leaving the soiled sheets in a heap on the ground.
Breathing heavily, the drunk stood there, swaying unsteadily and staring at the mess with a mix of confusion and horror. At that moment, a hospital security guard, who had witnessed the entire spectacle and was doing his best not to laugh, approached him.
“What’s going on here?” the guard asked, trying to keep a straight face.
The drunk, still wide-eyed and shaken, pointed at the offending pile and replied with utmost sincerity:
“I think I just beat the crap out of a ghost.”